All mental. All emotional. None having anything to do with the actual work itself.
Struggle is the mental and emotional anguish we create by repeating stories of why it’s not going to work out, framing ourselves as a victim, magnifying the inevitable inconveniences that pop up along our journeys, and focusing on problems over possibilities.
Most of us would be fine doing the work if we attached a different story to it.
It’s rarely the work that we dread.
It’s the stories we add on top of the work that transform it into struggle that we dread.
Even if the work (or situation) in front of us is objectively hard, we make it harder than it needs to be by adding struggle.
Yes, you have to work. But you don’t have to struggle.
02
It’s not going to work unless I have a perfect plan.
Having a vision before you start is essential.
Taking action is essential.
Having a plan is great, but not necessary.
Ideally, you would start with at least a broad plan, but even that isn’t necessary.
What’s most important is always knowing (and taking) the next best step.
It’s okay to start with step one, and trust that the others will be revealed to you as you go.
The thing about plans is that they only take into account the (limited) knowledge you have at the time you make the plan.
At the beginning of your journey, you don’t yet know what you don’t yet know.
80% of what you end up doing to accomplish your goal is going to be figured out on the way to accomplishing your goal–as you’re taking action, experimenting, figuring out what works and what doesn’t, and learning new things along the way.
Not having a perfect plan should never be the thing stopping you from execution.
Spending too much time on trying to make make the perfect plan serves two purposes (neither of which gets you closer to achieving your goal btw):
In this perfect plan you’ve crafted, you can live in a fantasy where everything works out exactly the way you expect it to in your beautifully formatted and color-coded spreadsheet, bullet journal, or Notion template–whichever is your drug of choice.
In this beautiful magical land, you don’t have to be burdened with pesky things like “taking action” or “receiving criticism” and therefore don’t have to face the inconvenient truth that everything will not work out exactly the way you want it to.
All you need at the beginning is a vision and your first step.
Vision tells you where to start.
Action tells you how to plan.
03
It’s not going to work unless I do it exactly like someone else.
Seek knowledge, mentors, and proven paths, yes.
There’s no need to reinvent the wheel when it comes to trying to start a youtube channel, improve your website’s SEO, build a social media presence, start an online business, write copy that converts, or anything else for that matter.
When you’re trying to do something new, don’t try to make it all up on your own.
It’s new to you, but it’s not new to someone else.
Take advantage of that.
Allow the knowledge and mistakes of other people who are ahead of you to be your shortcuts.
But don’t go all willy-nilly in the name of “figuring it out yourself,” and then get upset when you’re spinning your wheels getting nowhere because you’re basically stabbing in the dark trying to do something you’ve never done before and know nothing about.
There is a balance to be struck between modeling after what has proven to work and going rogue.
The best thing to do is to find ways to emulate what has worked for others who have achieved what you want to achieve, without copying, and while still allowing it to be colored with your unique personal style and vision.
You have a unique backstory, a unique personality, a unique look, a unique vibe, a unique sense of humor, a unique point of view, a unique purpose, a unique vision, unique talents, unique interests–okay you get it. That (sorry, one more) unique combination of things is what makes you pretty frickin’ special.
Therefore, there is something inside of you that needs to be brought forth in a way that only you can.
So while you’re watching youtube videos, taking online courses, and working with mentors (all of which I fully advocate and do myself), don’t get caught up in the excessive search for knowledge or proof of concept, while devaluing your own instincts.
Trust your intuition.
Don’t automatically assume someone else’s path (although pre-validated) is more valuable than your intuition. Use both in tandem.
Remember that there are universal strategies and concepts that are applicable to everyone, but allow for nuance.
Everyone is different, and everyone is on a journey that is specific to them, so just because you don’t do something exactly like someone else, it doesn’t mean what you’re doing, the way that you’re doing it, won’t work.
Maybe it means you’re the one who’s supposed to do it.
04
It’s not going to work unless other people believe in it too.
Other people do not have to agree with your vision in order for it to come true.
You don’t even have to share your vision with other people, let alone get their stamp of approval on it.
I’m a big fan of working in silence and allowing your finished product to speak for itself.
A completed project speaks much louder than a declaration of a dream.
But don’t be discouraged if you do share your dream with other people and they don’t share your enthusiasm.
Just because they don’t understand what you’re building, or don’t believe they can create it for themselves (this is what’s usually happening in these cases), doesn’t mean that you can’t create it for yourself.
Cheerleaders are nice, but not necessary.
You are the validator of your dreams.
Your dream is not invalidated just because someone else doesn’t believe in it.
You don’t need anyone else’s approval, nor permission to go after the vision that was imparted to you for your life.
Don’t get caught up in the superstition that people have some special jinx juice that has the power to make your dream not come true.
Stop giving people veto power over your vision.
This is also another way of relinquishing accountability and responsibility over your outcomes.
It’s easier to say:
The big meanie discouraged me, they jinxed it so I shouldn’t have told them, or it probably wouldn’t have worked anyway
than it is to say:
I didn’t really believe in myself enough to give it my all, I didn’t put in what it takes to get good enough, or I quit too soon.
